And so it begins.  Day 3.


I awoke, bounded down the stairs ready for my day.  I lie.  I drag my sorry self out of bed, barely moving with all sort of stinky breath and eye goop & basically fall down the stairs with only the smell of fresh coffee to propel me forward.  It’s early.  It’s dark.  It’s early.  Coffee.

Small children follow shortly there after.  {They’re not that small…but, please give me this}  As if in a slow motion iPhone video I hear the littlest Weed hopping down the stairs, my eyes widen as I scour the room for our little guy with a red stocking cap.  Oh pickles!  He’s still hugging the fat angel snowman.  Same as yesterday.  Agh!  I grab him & throw him into the closest place I can find.  Kid. You. Not.  The elf was launched in the air as not-so-little child rounds the corner into the room, landing just in the knick of time.

“where’s Flory?  he’s not still hugging the fat snowman.”

“not sure.  haven’t seen that crazy elf all morning.”

“Ohhhhhh, here he is.  Silly Flory!”

Here he is.


What’s that?  You can’t see him?  It’s like Where’s Waldo.  Play along here with me.  I’m in the middle of elfailure, remember?  Can you find him? Wait.  Here.  I’ll zoom in:


There he is.  Silly Flory!  Pinterest worthy, don’t you think?  Elf thrown in the poinsettia.  Original.  And it’s a new record for me.  Three days to elfailure this year.  I usually can make it at least a week.  bummer.  3 days.

So my big question is:  Who are you people?  Who are you parents who move that darn little elf every.single.night into fun and exciting predicaments.  Some of you are sewing outfits for your little elf to wear…outfits.  Who are you people?  I googled it.  Creative Elf Ideas.  Do you know what I got?  A hole load of creative ideas {and some mildly inappropriate ones}.  Hundreds and hundreds of them.  Elf arrangements that actually occurred.  Parents took time to arrange their elves in cute situations.  And then snapped a success picture for Pinterest. Who are you people?  I want to gleam your elf wisdom.  I want to peak inside your ideas, into your brain, into your creativity.  I want to be you.  Not the mom that throws her elf into a poinsettia.  Who does that?

Oh, this little elf.  He stresses me out.  I have ideas.  I do. Big ideas.  Fun ideas.  Amazing Pinterest-worthy ideas.  But I forget.  I finish up the night.  I’m sleepy-eyed.  I make the coffee {or watch the hubs make the coffee}.  I kiss the kids.  I go to bed.  I forget the elf.  elforget=elfailure!

It’s just too much.  My parents.  Now they had it made.  $2 to the German Club at the local high school & me and my big bro had a calendar filled with daily chocolate rations.  My parents had zero responsibility at that point.  My big bro and I always remembered the chocolate after dinner.  Always.  And we had to open the little door on the cardboard calendar right along the perforation to get that treat.  My parents did squat.  Who invented this blasted elf that requires so much of me?  So much.  It is too much.  Too much.

I am an elfailure.  Perhaps I will embrace it.  Perhaps Flory will be stuck in the poinsettia plant all advent season.  I will faithfully take a daily picture of him.  Still.In.The.Poinsettia.  *Sigh*  I must up my game.  Or not.  I just can’t decide.  I love that stupid elf.  And I hate him.  Ugh!  Where’s my chocolate?


Back to advent {elfless advent}

Here we are at Day 4 already in our advent adventure.  Today the song is a great one.  Son of God by Michael W. Smith.  Simple words, lyrically, but so powerful in their meaning.  “Heaven’s perfect plan unfolds, son of God.”

Luke 1:34-35

And Mary said to the angel, “How will this be, since I am a virgin?”

35 And the angel answered her, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you; therefore the child to be born will be called holy—the Son of God.

Today, just read over these two verses and consider Mary.  She would soon be pregnant with the Son of God.  Wow!  Too much to even comprehend.


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