tiny parts…

I was about 14.  I was a GA at my local church.  We were helping put together layettes for the local crisis pregnancy center.  I remember I didn’t even know what a layette was.  Turned out it was all the cutest of the cute things for babies – onesies, diapers, little bitty socks, binkies, bottles, tiny pink & blue hats & blankets.  How could a 14 year old girl not love sorting through all that cuteness?  We meticulously made little girl baskets & little boy baskets, imagining how fun they would be to receive.

I didn’t know what abortion was.  I didn’t know it even existed.  I had only recently realized that people who weren’t married were having sex & having babies.  Naïveté.  The day we delivered our little blue & pink bundles to the crisis pregnancy center I learned all about abortion & pro-choice & pro-life…anti-abortion & pro-abortion.  There was a line with two sides clearly drawn. No straddling the line.  Pick a side.

You may say that I was “brainwashed”, “indoctrinated” into a pro-life position that day.  Perhaps.  Fourteen year olds are quite impressionable, I would agree.  But I’ve done some research since those teen years, and I still cannot find a way to change my mind on this issue.

To me, that fetus is a baby.  Alive from the very first moment it is created.  I cannot believe otherwise.  No argument will change my belief on that.  None.

Likewise, if you hold a pro-choice position, believing abortion is alright, I doubt you will change your belief on that no matter what the argument.

We have all seen the same 4-D ultrasound technology of babies/fetuses in the womb.  We all have the ability to decide if that’s alive.  We all have the ability to determine whether removing that from the mommy’s womb is killing or something benign.

So here’s the thing, we seem stuck.  A line with two sides.  I’ve picked my side.  You’ve picked your side.  Maybe we’re on the same side, maybe we’re not.  Regardless if we agree, we must still be kind to one another.  We can go about without name calling, without degrading each other, without being cruel.  Both sides. We can.  We must.  This isn’t about who’s a moron or who’s an idiot.  It does no one any good to throw those names around.  No Good.

So, per the buzz of today…

Do I care that Planned Parenthood is selling baby parts, if in fact they are? I guess.

But the bigger issue to me is that they have baby parts.  They have baby parts.  From babies.  Parts.

I’m saddened that there are parts.  I’m saddened that in the safety of a mommy’s womb, babies are taken apart.  I’m saddened because I believe these are babies, not just bundles of tissue.  Babies.

Do I believe that tax dollars should fund abortion? No.

So here’s my deal.  I pay taxes.  I have no legal choice to not pay my taxes.  None.  And my tax dollars get all cozy & commingled with everyone else’s tax dollars.  And they pay someone to perform abortions.  These dollars pay for babies to die.  And I don’t want that.  I don’t want to pay for abortions.  I say “defund” simply because of this.  Not because I want women to go without healthcare.  Absolutely not!  I will gladly contribute to women’s healthcare.  But I cannot agree with paying for abortions.  I disagree with abortions.  Fundamentally, from my core.  So deeply is this belief rooted.  I don’t want to pay for abortions.  I don’t.

I think my wanting to defund Planned Parenthood comes from my grief that they are taking the lives of babies, rather than the fact that are possibly selling baby parts.  Tiny hearts and little brains and livers and kidneys and more.  What has been wrong with me?  I should have been outraged already that my government is paying for babies to be killed, regardless of whether the parts ended up in the rubbish or on the black market.  Does it really matter?  What’s better the landfill or a research lab?

But if I truly say that I don’t want to pay for abortions, then I need to look at my consumer dollars as well as my tax dollars!  Thing is, I might be {most likely 100% sure I am} paying for abortions regardless of the feds because I purchase products & services from companies that fund PP.  These are choices.  To have a Starbucks coffee, to buy Energizer batteries…and I’ll have to settle that in my conscience.  And it’s something everyone standing on this side needs to examine & consider before chanting “defund!”  Otherwise, how hypocritical.

To call for defunding, means to look at my wallet, to see where I give my dollars.  Planned Parenthood is funded by all kinds of companies in all kinds of industries.  Not just the federal government.  I must take action, regardless of how inconvenient {heeeelllllllooooo, Starbucks!} if I’m serious about what I’m wanting.  I must also defund.  I cannot be a hypocrite.  Can I eliminate 100% of my choice dollars from going to Planned Parenthood.  I wish.  But most likely some of my dollars will still fund abortions.  It’s an unfortunate part of legal abortions.  But to be aware & make the decisions without blinders on, is necessary.

This is no easy issue.  It’s a “hot topic” for a reason.  It is heated & the discussions surrounding it are intense.  I think it’s ok to be passionate about it, after all it is a life or death topic.  But it must be a civil conversation, no matter the level of heat surrounding it.

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