Free Mercy

He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.  Micah 6:8


Sixteen weeks ago we were handed the news that sweet ginger would be fighting the cancer beast.  Fear, unknown, anger, anxiety…just a few of the emotions that pumped through my veins in the days following.  We set the course, we leaned on each other & our friends and we stood as firmly as we could on our faith.  And we prayed.

We look back now with a treasure trove of positives.  Sweet ginger has fought hard & treatment is working.  Cancer is dying {or completely dead!}  For that we are thankful to God.  But 16 weeks ago, I had no idea what all this would look like.  Darkness lingered.  And I know that sometimes even with the greatest of hope, there still comes hurt.  Even with fervent prayers, the answers are not the ones we are requesting.  Sometimes the joy in the morning is many, many mornings away.  And there are times when no amount of faith will change the final earthly story.

There have been songs played these past 16 weeks that I cannot sing…”if that’s what it takes to praise you, then Jesus bring the rain”.  I have been standing with dark, ominous clouds all around, closing in on me & my family.  And I have prayed {unapologetically} to please don’t send anymore rain.  It’s ridiculously easy to sing about your faith & almost request that Jesus send the rain when you’re standing on a sun-filled day with no clouds in view.  But when the rain is so close your bones ache, and when you’ve stood in the middle of flooding rain waters before in your life…it’s just too much to ask for.

Over the past 16 weeks I’ve gotten some stuff right.  But I’ve also gotten a whole lot of stuff wrong.  I’ve been thankful.  And I’ve been oh, so angry.  I’ve quietly praised & loudly complained.  I’ve wrestled, really wrestled with God-on the ground, all out WWF style.  And I’ve praised & celebrated with hands-raised hallelujahs.  And I’ve questioned & whined & even bargained a little.  Because that’s what we do.  Us humans.  If we were able to get this all right, we definitely wouldn’t need the Word.  Or a Savior, for that matter.  Everyone is going to mess up.  Over little things & enormous things.  We do our best & rely on the saving grace of Jesus to fill the gaps of our humanity.  The Bible is filled with stories of people getting this all wrong.  But it’s also filled with the unrelenting chasing of our God towards us, arms open,  handing out abundant & extravagant grace.

I’ve learned a million lessons in the last 4 months.  {most that I would rather have never learned}  And I’m sure you’re thrilled {sarcasm font} to read them all.  But the top lesson has to be the power of mercy.  Throw that stuff around like you’ll never ever run out.  Hand it to every.single.person you ever come in contact with.  Especially those facing hardships that you cannot fathom, understand, imagine.  I have not always been so good at this.  Get off your high horse of judgment, of knowing exactly what is best, of thinking you understand how God uses another person’s story {a.k.a. pride} & get in the business of throwing around mercy.  Mercy says “God is bigger than any mistake you might be making”.  Mercy turns judgment on its head and destroys it.  Mercy eliminates shame.  Someone might not be where you are, or where you think they should be, or doing what you would do, or doing what you think they should be, but it might be exactly where God wants them, as He’s teaching them powerful lessons they need to learn.  There are people going through tremendous things, horrible situations, impossible moments.  They may be sitting in the dark.  Alone.  Give them compassion, grace, softheartedness, kindness.  Give them abundant mercy.  Because they likely won’t find the grace-filled arms of God through critique and judgment about how they’re sitting wrong in the dark, but will see Him clearly through the outpouring of abundant, undeserved, extravagant mercy.

3 thoughts on “Free Mercy

  1. ❤. I’m feeling so many emotions right now while I take this in and look at my life. Thank you for writing this and poring out your heart Kim. I’m praying for you all.

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